Come at me bro!
This is exactly why I drink coffee.
Maybe if your fingers weren’t so ducking fat, we would hat this problem.
Their true secret…revealed.
….until I poop strawberry rainbows into your shoe.
Jim Gaffigan on going to the gym…
It could also mean you’re a woman.
No one cooks a better dog than a dog…
You know what to do.
No matter where she tours, Rihanna keeps this as a motivational reminder in her dressing room.
I’m going to work on this right now.
That just went from Rocky vs. Clubber Lang to Cocky meets Luvver Man…
Somehow, I don’t think Darwin would be impressed.
I picked the wrong day to ride my bicycle.
You’re better off rubbing a calculator under your armpits.
They really do have an uncanny ability to sniff out a bitch.